The last few weeks I have had a lot on my plate. I look at the calendar and tell myself, “Only two more weeks until I work out with a pro”. That’s my justification for not working out everyday like I should. I did walk two miles yesterday in a hilly area, but I didn’t do anything on Monday. I did walk on Sunday.
I often ask myself and God, “What happened?” As beautiful as He made me (I say that completely humble without sounding vain). As I walked yesterday… legs hurting, thighs burning (I hear that is a good thing) it came to me… years of neglect.
I looked for a new place to move to last week, as I have been working on my exit plan to get a divorce. Yesterday, I thought not only have I neglected my body by eating what I wanted to for years and not working out; I have also neglected my husband by doing what I wanted to for years and often not consulting him.
People who really know me always say that I can do much better, or that I deserve much better. He definitely is a handful, but yesterday I thought about my part in creating the person he has become. For instance I work a lot. I make more money than most people realize. The thing is I also worked on our wedding day. I know who does that? Me. I would even make donations of $800 to $1,000 to different churches without consulting him.
New rule or resolution…write down all the areas of my life that needs housekeeping and ask God which ingredients to use. I’m sure forgiveness will be in there somewhere...myself, him, and others. I don’t think that I will file for divorce right away. I will just separate. I was also neglectful last week in forgetting to help one of my very best friends complete a project by the deadline. I am so sorry about that. So my friend in Grapevine, Texas, please forgive me. I have more on my plate these days than just food.
My weight this morning was 219.6
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